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It's Been One Year Since My Mastectomy

12/10/2014

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Wow. I can’t believe that last year on this day, I was waking up in the hospital – boobless and holy hell in a lot of pain.  My memories of that hospital stay aren’t very clear but I vividly remember my favorite hospital staff member.  It was the morphine pusher that came in every 4 hours.  I knew I didn’t want to be in physical pain but I also knew that I wanted my brain to be shut off from reality.  Morphine does that quite well.

It’s been a full year since that hospital stay and there’s no hiding from reality anymore.  I don’t text Lucia anymore and ask her if I really have cancer?  Looking back, it really did take many months for the reality of the situation to sink in.

Yesterday was my one-year anniversary from the day I had my double mastectomy.  I kept this anniversary to myself.  I told no one and didn’t post anything about it on my social sites.  Although I didn’t feel the need to celebrate it, there are a few very strange things that happened on this day.

Yesterday on December 9, 2014: I woke up to flowers and a card from Lucia.  The card was a simple and sweet thank you for putting up with the terrible work schedule she endures every year at this time.  Random?  Coincidence?

My Mom and my step Dad took me out to dinner.  They had to be out late and decided to eat out.  I got a phone call asking to meet them… strange for a Tuesday night.  Random? Coincidence?

My brother and I do talk very often, but not 3x in one day.  He called me three times yesterday! And I got to see my sister today too.

All in all, I celebrated the day with flowers, family, and dinner.  No one would guess that I didn’t tell a soul about my anniversary date. 

Happy #cancerversary to me – although really people, there’s nothing happy about it.  Other than maybe it’s over and I never have to do it again.


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I prefer not to be defined by cancer, but my life has certainly changed because of it.
Today, the simplicity of life and small moments of joy is what drives me.
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